He is the Walrus, goo goo g’joob.

May 3, 2010

So today sees us take on that horrible walrus and his bunch of journeymen. I always hate games against his teams because they never have any interest in actually playing football against us, they just want to kick players. There’s also the fact that he deludes himself into thinking that he always outwits us tactically, which is a load of c*ck. Instructing your players to kick the other team off the field isn’t tactically outwitting anyone. Though, of course, it never gets labeled as that, instead it is called ‘committed’ or ‘getting in their faces’ which gives it the misleading notion of being a good trait for a team to possess. Let’s hope we blow them off the field today and stick it to their hateful manager.

 

I don’t expect the team to change much from the one that faced Wigan. The keeper and back four should be the same. In midfield, I think that we will line up with Diaby, Song and Nasri in the middle, as Denilson has been ruled out for the rest of the season. I would go with Walcott and Van Persie out wide and Bendtner up front in order to give us a bit more aerial presence.

 

Almunia is still ruled out with his phantom wrist injury and it’s quite possible that he has played his last game for the club. I like Almunia, he seems like a very nice guy but, to be honest, he isn’t the required standard to be the Arsenal no1.

 

I also expect Arshavin to be out for the remainder of the season, joining Vermaelen, Denilson and Gallas on the list of muscular injuries, which seem to be one of our fortes.

 

For the kicking journeymen, Emerton, Grella, Samba and Diouf may all return. So expect some spitting and kicking from the latter.

 

I heard a rumour that the pitch at Ewood Park hasn’t needed fertilizing since the walrus took over as manager as his players do enough sh*t-kicking on it for that not to be warranted.

 

I won’t comment on the Arshavin quotes until they have been verified one way or the other. Though I suspect it’s a bit of agitating by an agent looking for a payday rather than the player himself.

 

Right, that’s it for today. Come on you Reds!

 

(One final note, the ‘walrus’ moniker comes courtesy of Arseblog. If you haven’t already read that site, check it out. You should also check out Gunnerblog, Goonerholic and East Lower)

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